(((READ EBOOK))) ☙ Wine, Tarts, & Sex ⇜ PDF eBook or Kindle ePUB free

Okay, so, this book was mostly meh for mealthough there was one scene with a zuchinni that caused momentary hysterical blindness (((READ EBOOK))) ⇱ Wine, Tarts, & Sex ☞ From the New York Times bestselling author whose torrid tales are legendary Robin Shone comes another steamy story set in the kitchen World renowned chef Jake Chambers could have had any ing nue he wanted in California since the kitchen isn t the only room in the house where the hard bodied hunk has special talents Still, when he realized there might be to life than glitz and silicone, he left for Minneapolis to buy a local joint and try to clear his head But even though he s no longer serving the glitterati, that doesn t mean he s about to compromise quality and serve a Minnesota wine However, local vintner Liv Bell with curves even delicious than his tapas has other plans once she lays eyes on this Adonis Determined to promote her vineyard s juicy bounty, this sun kissed goddess might just bring Jake around to at least tasting what she has to offer Cheesy, quasi romantic read for horn dogs. I had not realised Susan Johnson wrote contemporary books I chanced upon this book in my library Overdrive and decided to give it a shot.From what I remembered of SJ historical romance, it was pretty much sex, sex andsex, though some characters were interesting I remembered her heroines were usually strong, knew their mind and definitely not shy about their sexuality The heroes were usually rakes but likeable overall.In this story, the couple were pretty much the same During certain mo I had not realised Susan Johnson wrote contemporary books I chanced upon this book in my library Overdrive and decided to give it a shot.From what I remembered of SJ historical romance, it was pretty much sex, sex andsex, though some characters were interesting I remembered her heroines were usually strong, knew their mind and definitely not shy about their sexuality The heroes were usually rakes but likeable overall.In this story, the couple were pretty much the same During certain moments, I did get baffled by why Liv got so assertive and angry enough to hit Jakebut then I was skimming the sexy scenes so thereNo denial some of the sexy times were hot Especially when Jake demonstrated his prowess sculpturing vegetables Since Jake was a renowned chef and Liv a vintner vineyard owner farmer, it s to be expected there s lots of delicious food and wines being described I really enjoyed those bits BUT I truly cannot get how they could go from eating straightaway to sex Firstly , it is hygiene issue and secondly, if their stomachs were so full of food and wine, wouldn t they get sick from such vigorous bed sport LOLSPOILERS SPOILERS The ending took me by surpriseI did not expect such an abrupt Happy For Now ending cos they were discussing the POSSIBILITY of a long term relationship this was the morning after their make up sexual marathon after three weeks of fight separationbecause she overheard him kind of belittling her wines Something didn t sit right with me about this whole conflict He was used to the world s best, and it was obvious even she knew her wines would never be Grand Cruyet she took offence and told him to F off basically.After three weeks missing each other, they met by chance at a night club and both were too hot for each other they left together to go back to her place Credit to Jake for not shying away and apologising to her right offin the car So if he had not apologised Liv would still have gone to bed with himbecause she needed her orgasms HmmThroughout the book I didn t see the connection between them to be honest I only see pure sexual chemistry between them and this so called connection waslike intense sexual attraction to each other so much so they didn t know how to handle it Well for the first time Jake wanted to cook for a woman, we were told about how Liv never had so much sex with one man, but we don t know WHY It always was about the sex In this the romance was weak.Of course the side story of Janie and her own love life provided all the drama and suspense action In fact Roman and Janie threatened to overshadow Jake and Liv I am just not very used to SJ s language In her historicals, the crude sex words seemed anachronistic to me But certain words and phrases in this contemporary did not sit right with me either Big words like equivocate and its forms were used quite a few times, as were politesse and French words like beaucoup and gendarmes I am curious why would these French words appear hereI know Jake is Eurasian Japanese mother, Caucasian father I assume and he did speak a smattering of French but Liv, and general narrative Maybe I think too much This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers To view it, click here I am fully aware that a handful of authors waves at Tiffany Reisz have spoiled me for lesser erotica That said, this book hadplot holes than a screen door, and only exactly as much characterization as required for two people to fall into bed A few specific annoyances Heroine s an up and coming winemaker, that s cool What do we learn about her wines over 300 pages She makes a red and a white, she thinks they re great, and hotshot chef Hero thinks they re okay, but he doesn t want I am fully aware that a handful of authors waves at Tiffany Reisz have spoiled me for lesser erotica That said, this book hadplot holes than a screen door, and only exactly as much characterization as required for two people to fall into bed A few specific annoyances Heroine s an up and coming winemaker, that s cool What do we learn about her wines over 300 pages She makes a red and a white, she thinks they re great, and hotshot chef Hero thinks they re okay, but he doesn t want to serve them in his restaurant That s it Come on, you can t put Wine in the title of the book, make the heroine a vintner, and then have no wine talk whatsoever At least tell me if the white is sweet or dry, and if the red iscab sav than merlot Inquiring minds want to know The Big Blowup occurs when she overhears Hero and a fellow chef talking about how her wines are average at best She s hurt, her pride is hurt, she storms out never to speak to him again, they both spend a few weeks broodingthen their eyes meet across the room at a club, and suddenly everything is okay, everyone has different tastes, let s not fight when we could be having orgasms It s the lamest fight and make up ever At one point during their sexual marathon, he has to make some business calls, and decides to entertain her while he s on the phone So he pops into the kitchen, carves a dildo out of a zucchini I swear I am not making this up , and hands it to her to play with while he makes his calls and occasionally joins in with one hand I mean, I don t like zucchini as a food, using it as a sex toy is beyond the pale Not to mention unhealthy The plot, such as it is when the Hero and Heroine are not having wild amounts of sex, involves a friend of Heroine s who married a rich jerk, and is now fleeing from him with their small well behaved child in tow Heroine s friend is an overdramatic gold digger who immediately latches onto another man, the jerk husband has not a single redeeming quality and yet we spend several chapters looking at the world through his eyes, which made me feel gross , and I really didn t care about either of them Escape or not, get custody or not, whatever And finally, while the sex was hot, the way it was written waskind of uncomfortable Both Hero and Heroine are attracted to each other in a purely physical sense, and they both think to themselves quite often that this is weird, that they shouldn t be indulging their lusts to this extent, they re not usually sex maniacs Yet all they have to do is look at each other, and Hero s dick jumps to attention while Heroine ruins another set of panties It was a fun, sexy brain cleanser after a long Monday That s all it was is Ok read for me Plot didn t pull me in, and the characters didn t stand out. The author isliterate than most romance authors No grammatical issues, lots of appropriately used big words From a literary standpoint, well done Having said that, in spite of the appropriate words used pu y, c nt and lots of sex, most of it was alluded to and the few times it was spelled out, it wasglossed over than dwelled on IOW, while I got the feeling this was intended to be a hot book, there was so much glossing over that it waslike a cozy blanket than a roarin The author isliterate than most romance authors No grammatical issues, lots of appropriately used big words From a literary standpoint, well done Having said that, in spite of the appropriate words used pu y, c nt and lots of sex, most of it was alluded to and the few times it was spelled out, it wasglossed over than dwelled on IOW, while I got the feeling this was intended to be a hot book, there was so much glossing over that it waslike a cozy blanket than a roaring fire The story itself, ah yes the story A player meets a woman who oddly for her becomes instantly turned on when in his presence So they go for it, and it s apparently addictive in that he s unable to leave kick her out of bed whatever unless a crisis comes up that forces the issue At the same time, he s increasingly cranky whenever he s not too distracted by her hot snatch to notice that he s becoming addicted Errr that is to say, whenever he stops boinking her long enough to ponder a bit on the addictive qualities of said snatch, he starts to panic Side story that rather brings to mind the First Wives Club adds a bit of distraction from his paranoia that he s going to be harnessed and or broken to saddle She, because she knows he s a player, is valiantly trying not to think about her own addiction Although I am a fan, I find Susan Johnson s contemporary romances lacking the personality of her historical works Not sure what it is, but she seemsat home writing in that genre than in the one this was written in That said, this is better than a few of the others that she has written in this vein Not for the plot The plot is like a wide trail in the road even a child could follow, however Many of the love scenes are written very much in Johnson s erotic vein, and that is really th Although I am a fan, I find Susan Johnson s contemporary romances lacking the personality of her historical works Not sure what it is, but she seemsat home writing in that genre than in the one this was written in That said, this is better than a few of the others that she has written in this vein Not for the plot The plot is like a wide trail in the road even a child could follow, however Many of the love scenes are written very much in Johnson s erotic vein, and that is really the best writing in the novel I particularly liked the one in the pantry near the end of the novel but other than those few bright moments, the writing in this story is very much rote and mechanical lacking some essential animation as though Johnson was writing to fulfill a contract as opposed to doing something because she loved the thing.Not her best work by any stretch of the imagination, but a throwaway beach book, or mindless activity to occupy one half of the brain while othermeaningful thinking occurs on the other side.Buy at your own risk better to borrow from someone else Delightful romp with great sex, food wine A soft sweet bit of fluff that reflects the way women want sex Kept my attention without making me feel skeezy or dirty for reading it I DEFINITELY enjoyed it Delightful romp with great sex, food wine A soft sweet bit of fluff that reflects the way women want sex Kept my attention without making me feel skeezy or dirty for reading it I DEFINITELY enjoyed it Hot sexy story, but the main characters were shallow crude I didn t really care about them, and the romance between them was almost nonexistent without the sex It was too repetitive with them both fighting their feelings that this wasthan just sex, when all they REALLY wanted WAS sex Hot sexy story, but the main characters were shallow crude I didn t really care about them, and the romance between them was almost nonexistent without the sex It was too repetitive with them both fighting their feelings that this wasthan just sex, when all they REALLY wanted WAS sex